This website is not to find

The One.

but to find the

Right Relationship for you –  

in the clearest, most conscious way possible.

Let’s start with a truth:

Your love life is not shaped by luck – it’s shaped by patterns of choice.

You may recognise the patterns.
You may even see them happening.
But recognising is not the same as choosing differently.

That’s where most people get stuck.
They see – and they move anyway, falling back into the same dynamics.

The work I do is about that moment between recognition and decision.

It’s not coaching that reaffirms hope.
It’s coaching that clarifies choice.

Dating Pattern Test

What is Dating Decision Work?

Everyone brings history into new connections. 
Most people bring that history unexamined.

That’s why:

Dating feels exhausting.
The same outcomes repeat.
Attraction turns into familiar frustration.
You may ask, “Why am I here again?”

Dating Pattern Test

You already know more than you think.
But insight alone doesn’t change behaviour.
Decisions do.

My work supports you when patterns repeat; clarity arrives without action; a pause is needed before a choice; the next step dictates what comes next for you.


This is not about motivation.
It’s about orientation.

And without it you may find yourself over time saying things like:

“All men/women/ relationships are the same, what’s the point?”

“Maybe I’m not supposed to be with anyone.”

“Relationships are too much work.…”

“I don’t need anyone.”

“I’m better on my own.”

“I’m too old.”

“I don’t want to cook or clean for anyone.”

“Sex is over rated.”

“Intimacy? Can’t even remember what that’s like.”

“I need to ‘finish’ my inner work first before ‘I’m ready’ for a relationship.”

“I don’t know how to establish boundaries.”

Are you ready to change your lens?


Are you ready to do the work?


Dating and Relationships shouldn’t feel like a burden or a job, but they do take work, dedication, conscious investment, and effort.

My approach


I don’t diagnose people.
I don’t label personalities as “good” or “bad”.
I help you notice relational patterns before you act on them.

This isn’t therapy.
It’s Decision Work.

And decisions change behaviour – and outcomes.

Services & Products

  • Session Zero

    A focused 1h orientation session to identify the current challenge of the client. We evaluate if a Coaching Program is needed, and its duration and goals to work on together.

  • One-on one Decision Coaching

    Deep, structured support for conscious dating decisions and relational patterns. You may do single sessions or a Coaching Program (to be explored in Session Zero).

  • Workshops

    Interactive group experiences that make relational structure visible and usable, as well as training in Non-Violent Communication.

  • Game of Hearts

    A decision tool you can use on your own or with others to support pattern recognition before the next relational choice. A deck of 52 cards, with instructions and a Dating Patterns test.

Articles

Homage to MEN

As promised... I could not end 2020 without an article on the amazing creature that inhabits planet Earth, called "man". I know for many people, this year has been terrible/ a year to forget / a year that never existed / a virus "in the…
Read more

Don’t be the Woman who “waits”.

(photo: Jordania 2013) We have all been there. The phone doesn't ring. The text doesn't come. So, we send one. The reply comes in, maybe 1h, maybe a day later. And it's shorter than ours, doesn't have the same zest. We reply with a longer one. We…
Read more

A Decision Made is a Second Skin

A Decision that is made becomes a Second Skin I came across this sentence and fell in love with it. It completely translates what happens in my body when manage to make an important or difficult decision that had been weighing on me. It is…
Read more

Homage to MEN

As promised... I could not end 2020 without an article on the amazing creature that inhabits planet Earth, called "man". I know for many people, this year has been terrible/ a year to forget / a year that never existed / a virus "in the…
Read more

Don’t be the Woman who “waits”.

(photo: Jordania 2013) We have all been there. The phone doesn't ring. The text doesn't come. So, we send one. The reply comes in, maybe 1h, maybe a day later. And it's shorter than ours, doesn't have the same zest. We reply with a longer one. We…
Read more

A Decision Made is a Second Skin

A Decision that is made becomes a Second Skin I came across this sentence and fell in love with it. It completely translates what happens in my body when manage to make an important or difficult decision that had been weighing on me. It is…
Read more
Read All

Testimonials

“Before working with Elisa, I always needed closure to move on. I would insist, even after being ghosted, trying to understand the other person’s reasons. Now, I no longer do that. I learned not to invest too fast emotionally, and not to put all my eggs in one basket. I pay more attention to red flags, and I don’t confuse what I need with just wanting the ‘perfect’ relationship. Now, I stay present, more careful with my heart, and clear about what’s aligned with me or not.”

”One of Elisa’s greatest gifts is her deep, genuine curiosity. From the moment you start working with her, you feel it, she’s not just asking questions, she’s guiding you layer by layer into what’s really driving your patterns. You start to see things clearly: what you’ve been repeating, why it’s felt so hard to change, and what’s finally possible. Her presence is warm, intuitive, and powerful. She’s right there with you as things click, celebrating your clarity and your growth.”

“I came to Elisa at a low point, stuck in a relationship I couldn’t fully let go of, even though I knew it wasn’t right for me. With her support, I started to see more clearly, not only the situation, but also why it was so hard to let go. Step by step, I found the strength to leave something that was taking my energy and confidence. Without this work, I think I could have stayed many more years. Elisa helped me to choose and decide differently, in a way that respects who I am.”

“I could recognize my dating patterns, but I kept acting anyway. Working with Elisa helped me stay with what I was seeing long enough to choose differently. That I finally stopped a pattern I’d repeated for years and years.”

“Elisa helped me see the archetypes I was unconsciously drawn to in dating, and how those patterns were shaping my choices. Through our conversations, I started recognising familiar dynamics early on. That awareness changed everything. I’m now making clearer, healthier decisions in love. Muito obrigado, Elisa.”

Newsletter

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Dating Pattern Test